Evolutionary Theory and Premature Ejaculation
I know that sometimes you might feel that you’re the only one who comes within minutes. Trust me- you’re not. Premature ejaculation is a lot more common that you might think. Now obviously in this post we define PE a bit different- everyone who generally ejaculates before he wants to has ‘PE’ in my book. In 1996 a group of researchers went out to look for physiological causes of PE and in particular penile sensitivity. What they found was that premature ejaculation in some men is actually a result of penile hypersensitivity (1).
If you look at evolutionary theory however, this ‘hypersensitivity’ is more or less the norm- or it used to be anyway. You might have heard before that premature ejaculation is ingrained in our DNA so to speak because for us men it allows us to quickly procreate with a variety of women to ensure the survival of our genes.
Sex therapist and best-selling author Ian Kerner hit the nail on the head:
“Believe it or not, premature ejaculation (PE) wasn’t always considered a problem — in fact, it used to be something to strive for! Hundreds of thousands of years ago, the premature ejaculator would have been considered the superior male because he could fertilize a woman more quickly. That allowed him to have sex with more women and father more children, winning the “sperm wars” and earning his place at the head of his tribe. It also helped his family thrive. Cavemen and women weren’t exactly retiring to a honeymoon suite to have intercourse: most sex was had outdoors, where animal predators could easily make the couple into a tasty snack.
This added risk contributed to anxiety, causing the man to ejaculate even earlier. Yet men who finished faster were valued because shorter sex meant reduced exposure to danger. In primitive times, there was likely little to no awareness of the female orgasm, so coming quickly probably wasn’t considered a problem for either party. We’ve all heard the phrase “survival of the fittest,” but in sexual terms it was all about survival of the quickest.”
So let’s get one fact straight: premature ejaculation isn’t that ‘premature’ evolutionary speaking. So called ‘hypersensitivity’ sounds dramatic and even though I’m in no position to argue with their findings for there obviously is some truth in it, I do not agree with the fact that people who suffer from PE are the exception because they are ‘hypersensitive’. It is a normal part of our biological make-up. Luckily, we can defy nature and turn the tables quickly.
The Sympathetic State
The sympathetic nervous system ‘stimulates’ ejaculation. This might come as no surprise since the sympathetic state generally affects our genitals once we have a rapid heartbeat (above 120-130 in general though it depends on your age). The first lesson we should draw from this is: you need to learn to stay relaxed during sex- mentally and physically as contradictory as that might sound. Not only do you help yourself getting better erection once you learn to relax- it will also be more difficult to actually ejaculate.
Overview of Main Causes of PE
There are essentially three main causes of PE namely:
•Psychological
•Sympathetic
•Habitual
We’ve already discussed the psychological elements in this article, now it’s time to discuss the other causes.
Sympathetic
Generally speaking, when the sympathetic nervous system is most active we will ejaculate much faster. During this most active state of the sympathetic nervous system our breathing pace increases as well as our body tension amongst other things. Thus, when we start to breathe more rapidly, clenching our muscles, we make it easier for ourselves to ejaculate. This is what I refer to as the domino effect.
There are two main sympathetic causes of PE namely:
1) Shallow Breathing
2) Body Tension
Shallow Breathing
Next time you masturbate or have sex try to pay attention to the pace of your breathing. You’ll notice that as you get ‘closer’ to orgasm you start to breathe faster and shallower. By breathing shallow I mean breathing in and out via your mouth but only taking in a small gasp of air every time you inhale. By not breathing optimally we deprive our body from oxygen it needs in the heat of the moment- a medical condition called anoxaemia. In a study where researches constricted the abdominal area with a corset, anoxaemia and even hyperventilation were far more likely to occur in test subjects (2). Though the study is very old, physical laws did not change in the meantime thus the same rules apply.
The take-away here is that by abdominal constriction (e.g. missionary full weight leaning on the girl) guys can make themselves more likely to hyperventilate or deprive the body from oxygen. Rapid breathing only shortens the time it takes for you to ejaculate.
Body Tension
In addition to shallow breathing guys also tend to tense up once they get close. This is normal. Yet, it is quite counterproductive. Remember that once we get close to ejaculation our (pelvic) muscles clench? More specifically it’s mostly our PC muscles and urethral muscles that start to tense up- until they ‘release’ and start contracting rhythmically causing the expulsion of semen via the penis. Once we tense up some muscles (usually abdomen, legs and arms first) it affects nearby muscles and eventually the pelvic muscles speeding up the time it takes for the PC muscles and urethral muscle to reach a state of ultimate tension that is alleviated via rhythmic contractions and thus ejaculation.
What can we learn from this? If we learn to release this level of tension we immediately slow down the process and therefore will be able to last significantly longer. How do we do this? Simply put it’s this: relax your muscles if you notice you are tensing up. If you become more aware you’ll learn to objectively look at your level of arousal and level of tension meaning you will consciously be able to realize that you are tensing up and need to relax. You simply alleviate the tension by combining the breathing technique and relaxing the muscles (usually it’s the abdomen, PC muscles, legs and arms so pay attention to those). It’s just like flexing your muscles in the gym and relaxing them again.
Habitual
Below you can find the main habitual causes of PE. I call them habitual because they are ingrained habits and their negative effect on our sexual health is the culmination of years of consistently repeating the behavior.
1) Rapid Masturbation
2) Underdeveloped PC muscles
3) Lack of Arousal Control
Rapid Masturbation
You know what this is about. It’s all about our masturbation habits. Another big factor in overcoming rapid ejaculation is changing the way you masturbate. Like said before, if you condition yourself to always cum within a couple of minutes every time you masturbate you’ll slowly but surely (re)wire yourself in such a way that your body will be used to ejaculating quickly.
Therefore, if you truly want to work on this you need to change the way you masturbate. You need to increase the duration of each ‘session’ (the same goes for those with PE who have a partner- practice lasting longer via masturbation). Conditioning yourself to last longer by prolonging the session and continuously bring yourself close to orgasm but not enough to go ‘overboard’ is called edging
Underdeveloped PC muscles
The PC muscles are the biggest leverage we can use to our advantage when it comes to lasting longer. However, due to lack of some training and awareness, most of us don’t use these sex muscles, or use them in a wrong way, without even knowing it. As stated before, by clenching the PC muscles in the wrong way we start a domino effect in the pelvic area- making it easier for us to come. A lot of you reading this will be doing this- without even knowing it.
Many guys are aware of the importance of strong PC muscles, yet very few of us actually do something about it. We think it doesn’t matter we don’t ‘workout our PC muscles’. This is flawed logic. If you want to (re)gain complete control over how long you can last being knowledgeable and able to use your PC muscles in your favor is crucial. It’s not just about tensing up the PC muscle-as most books often recommend.
Lack of Arousal Control
Remember how I stressed that controlling your Caveman (animalistic) impulses is essential in overcoming premature ejaculation? Well, here is why: you need to learn to control those impulses when you begin to condition yourself in lasting longer. The number #1 factor that determines whether you’ll be able to last for as long as you’d like and not even making it through ‘the first round ‘ is getting used to highly arousing physical stimulation yet making sure that you don’t go overboard and ejaculate.
This is the problem with most guys: they’re enjoying the sex and suddenly, out of nowhere, they feel that they’re going to cum and there is nothing they can do about it. Depending on the guy and situation this could be within one minute or 10 minutes. It doesn’t matter how long though because the point is that if you want to last longer you need to become aware of how close you actually are to cumming- and then apply the techniques presented.
Basically you want to make sure that you are:
1). Able to recognize where you are in terms of arousal (and how close you are to cumming)
2). Can tone your level of ‘arousal’ up (if you want to cum), or down (if you want to go on for a while).
This is what I mean by arousal control. You need to learn how to monitor this level of arousal you’re experiencing and influence it as you please.
The Main Causes of Premature Ejaculation
Now you know the most important things you should work on if you want to be able to last all night. I know it sounds like a lot at first but it won’t take that much time to actually apply the advice and be a machine in a relatively short period of time. As you know by now there are a lot of factors that come into play when it comes to solving both PE. To help you, here is an overview of the main causes of PE:
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1. Xin, C.Z., & Chung, W.S., & Choi, Y.D., & Seong, D. H. &, Choi, Y.J., & Choi., H.K. (1996). Penile Sensitivity in Patients With Primary Premature Ejaculation. The Journal of Urology. Vol. 156-979-981
2. Haldane, J.S., & Meakins, .J.C., & Priestley, J.G. (1919). The Effects of Shallow Breathing. The Journal Of Physiology.